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My learning experience

I had a big learning experience today.

It all started like this....Every once in a while, I start getting very jittery and insecure about my looks (well, I AM a woman, and this proves it!) So today I landed up at the salon to get my unruly locks into some semblance of order. Normally, I do so by getting the damn thing cut; but I guess something I had eaten had probably addled my brain, so I signed up for a session of permanently straightening my hair.

I coined a new explanation for torture today. Torture = 3 hours of sitting in the salon while the stylist applies some awful smelling gooey stuff to your hair, then wait till the smell has permeated to every cell in your body, then wash it, then blow dry it, then apply something else, then wait, then wash, then iron, then apply something more, then wait, and then wash..... all while you pretend to enjoy it. Well I was tortured today, and if it had continued any longer, I swear to god - I would have killed myself or my hair stylist.

While I was smiling through this experience, I needed something to do. So I found some magazines. I flipped through them & felt a major attack of inferiority complex coming up. There's so much I'm woefully unequipped to deal with. I thought I knew all the answers; but today was the day of reckoning, of learning; and of being humbled -
  • which is the best mascara (err...black?)
  • how should you choose make-up (....choose whether you wear it or not?)
  • how to keep your hands supple & soft (....you mean hands can be soft & supple?)
  • how to please your man in bed (...lie down ?)
  • how to make the bed (...you mean you don't just put a sheet on it ?)
  • how to rear a emotionally well rounded child (....is there one in this world, look at me AND my friends)
  • how to get stains off your sofa (...hmmm...try not sit on it?)
  • which designer clothes to buy (ahmmm...hmmm...hmmm! okay, okay, I don't know this one; but then its not my fault - my husband never made enough money)
  • how to wear pink & green (together).... (eeessshhh.... I don't want to!)

....and so on...

Man, there's a lot that you don't learn through Engineering & an MBA and then 8 years of consulting. My education has been so incomplete all these years; and no one told me about it...

Obviously this was just too much for my miniscule brain to take in one go. Feeling very morose, I flipped over some pages, only to land up on the section on Tell us your Dirty Secrets. Now this wasnt a section I was going to gloss over. No, no, no, a mature mind like me is always thirsty to learn more. So here's what I learnt are some people's dirty secrets-

- My husband is a male prostitute
- I made my sister my husband's concubine
- I caught my father-in-law molesting our maid
- We walk naked in our house on Sunday

My middle class morality said - Wow ! What education ! What learning ! What pillars of journalism !

....and then they want us to raise emotionally well rounded children....

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey, I commented on your last 2 posts.

You tried to straighten your hair!!!!! What do you see in your mirror everyday?????

Vin

MusingsinKL said...

well, now its straighter. Will send you pictures as soon as husband dear decides to take some

MusingsinKL said...

PS: And I know you're the only one reading my posts. How about getting me some of that glory & publicity that you promised

S. said...

Haha! I read the male prostitute one as well! Isn't it the one where she comes back and finds the bed broken or something like that? Wahaha!

Thank you for your blog. Thank you.